October is the month I would have been due, before my second miscarriage. July was my due-month before my first miscarriage. Thankfully, I’m pregnant now – well past the point I miscarried my previous pregnancies and due in February. I’m at the halfway mark of pregnancy! Only 20 more weeks to go, more or less.
Some of the harder moments for me are when someone asks me if this is my second pregnancy. And (other than for my personal medical providers) I just say yes. I want to say, “No, this is my fourth pregnancy, I lost two.” But I don’t because the situation usually isn’t appropriate for that.
I don’t feel the grief-pain acutely anymore, time has erased most of the sharpness. But sometimes I ache. Sometimes the memory of the grief makes me tear (pregnancy hormones don’t help)...Read More